Authorities have been keen to assure the public that a large conflagration is extremely unlikely, not least because by the time organizers are able to light the last few candles, the first few will have already gone out. Most importantly, the local fire department is on standby to put out any potential blaze from the large number of candles on MRS SMITH's birthday cake. We hear that local costume stores have almost sold out of walking frames, grey wigs and reading glasses, so we're sure that MRS SMITH is going to feel right at home! In order to make MRS SMITH feel more comfortable on her big day, guests have been invited to attend in costume to match the age of the birthday girl. Local restaurant "The Soup and Straw" in TOWNSVILLE town center will be the venue for the event, and the kitchen staff have been working around the clock to create an exciting menu of soft and easily-digestible dishes for MRS SMITH and her guests to enjoy. Next week marks the 60th birthday of TOWNSVILLE resident JANE SMITH and plans are under way to see her out of middle age in style! MRS SMITH's friends and family have been organizing the birthday celebrations for several months in order to give her forthcoming dotage the full recognition it deserves.
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